My husband's supervised parole termination hearing was Monday 12/22. First, let me say that we went in there knowing full well that it would be a waste of time. But, we had them reaching really low to come up with reasons why they wouldn't terminate his supervised parole. His lawyer was armed with facts about re-offense percentages that I had supplied him. Then of course, he was able to to dis-credit the psych eval since my husband's therapist never gave him the evaluations and were making up the answers. So, from the bottom of the garbage dump, they came up with 4 new reasons:
1) He's challenging his forced registration since under Maryland law he is not required to register since his conviction was back in 1979.
2) He hasn't been married long enough. (ok, we've been married 16 months, but have co-habitated for 2+ years)
3) He hasn't been employed long enough. (Forget the fact that except for the 11 months that he couldn't find a job because of all the travel restrictions his PO placed on him and being a CDL driver, in this day and time, you can't find truck jobs that stay in MD, DE, and VA. And accept applicants with a felony conviction. Prior to that, he has always been gainfully employed. Luckily, the PO changed his restrictions allowing him to travel out of state as long as he calls him before going out and upon return and he has to be back in the tri-state area within 24 hours. He's returned to work in July 2008.)
4) He doesn't have an up to date polygraph. (Ok...this is a biggie. They aren't requesting a polygraph that will ask questions on his conviction or therapeutic purposes, but of investigative purposes. Which is illegal. They want to ask him if he's committed any new crimes.)
As you can see...they were really reaching.....
My daughter went with us and was able to say her peace but when it came to my turn, I was grilled like a felon. Bombarding me with questions. I really felt dirty after leaving that place. Course, my husband's lawyer stated I answered the questions really well and even did a fantastic job on one question. The investigator asked me if I ever initiated a visit with his PO. Sorry, I laughed!!! So, instead of telling her why I really would never call his PO....I simply stated, "I have no reason to" which I haven't. But the fact remains, I don't trust him, I don't respect him. He's a liar, he wants to violate my husband so bad that eventually he's going to make something up. He even told the sheriff deputy who handles the registration that he would love to violate him. That's like telling the man..."Get me some dirt on him!" I thought PO's are supposed to make sure their charges walk the straight and narrow but at the same time be encouraging and supportive. HA!!!!!! He'd rather violate him, then shoot him in the back stating that he was trying to run. Not to mention, this same ass hole spent 45 mins trying to convince me not to marry my husband. State PO's aren't allowed to do that and I'm sure Feds aren't either. The whole purpose of parole is to allow these guys to get on with their life and improve their life. Not to mention the little personal remarks he makes to me when he visits...might not seem like much...but he's crossing the line. Remarks like..."oh, you've darkened your hair!" "Been out in the sun? You are really tan!" No, I don't trust him.
Needless to say, my husband is appealing. Again, not that its going to do any good. And then there is next year's term. hearing. I wonder what they will dig up by then?
Friday, December 26, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
No Christmas This Year
My husband and I have decided we are not having Christmas this year. With my back injury and worker's comp not getting off any $$$ yet, we are way behind in bills and there is nothing left over. This will be the first year in all my 48 years that there will be no Christmas tree, no decorations, no nothing. With today's economy, how can anyone afford Christmas? What if you spent all that money on Christmas, and then the day after, you get laid off from work?
New development with my husband's ass hole of a probation officer. It wasn't enough that he forced my husband to register against Maryland State law once, now he had to go and register in a different county, the county that he works in. There is no such requirement in Maryland saying you must register in multiple counties. Why do such people as his p.o. be allowed to remain in their position. Oh...I forgot to mention, when my husband went to re-register with the Sheriff, was when he found out that he had to register that very day in the other county. Nothing from his P.O. If my husband hadn't gone in early to re-register for his 6 month requirement, he would have known nothing about having to re-register and his P.O. would have violated him and sent him back to jail. I, also need to mention that the Lt. who is in charge of the registration, also thinks this PO is an ass hole. He also told my husband that this PO told him "I would really love to violate this guy!" Bascially, he means..."Get me something on him so I can violate him and put his ass back into prison." Thank God the Lt. is a very fair person whose only requirement his that his registrants abide by the rules of the registration.
New development with my daughter. Her ex found out where her safe room was so we had to move her to another location. It is really sad that he remains free while she remains locked up with her fears. She had to change her cell phone number because she was getting hundreds of blocked phone calls a day. The justice system does not work in favor for the victims. They do not protect the victims or even give them hope. With his past history of assaulting women, he should have never been allowed to post bail. Not only is he harassing my daughter, he tried to run my husband off the road. And every so often, I still see a car parked across the street with their bright lights trained on my house. When my husband is at work, I go to bed at night with a baseball bat, a can of hair spray and a lighter. I figure if he does break in, he has to go through my 115 pound Belgium Shepherd. If he succeeds in getting by those big fangs, then I am going to have a surprise waiting for him. And believe me, I will not hesitate to do what I have to do to keep him from getting his hands on me.
My husband's annual parole termination hearing is this month. We know that the chance of him getting off supervised parole is slim to none, since his PO said it would never happen, but still we try. He's been appointed a new federal public defender. A young guy who was a very aggressive trial lawyer from New York. So while our chances are slim, the hearing should prove to be very interesting.
I think I've caught you up to date with my news. Don't forget to check out my interview. The site is posted in my previous blog. She did include a little about my husband's story on a side bar....so the interview was a success. (Just be warned...the picture of me is terrible. They wanted my serious side..lol)
So, in closing, How have you all been? Thanks to those who have continued to read my blogs and left me comments. I publish all comments, favorable or not. After all, this is supposedly a free country where you are entitled to your own pinion.
New development with my husband's ass hole of a probation officer. It wasn't enough that he forced my husband to register against Maryland State law once, now he had to go and register in a different county, the county that he works in. There is no such requirement in Maryland saying you must register in multiple counties. Why do such people as his p.o. be allowed to remain in their position. Oh...I forgot to mention, when my husband went to re-register with the Sheriff, was when he found out that he had to register that very day in the other county. Nothing from his P.O. If my husband hadn't gone in early to re-register for his 6 month requirement, he would have known nothing about having to re-register and his P.O. would have violated him and sent him back to jail. I, also need to mention that the Lt. who is in charge of the registration, also thinks this PO is an ass hole. He also told my husband that this PO told him "I would really love to violate this guy!" Bascially, he means..."Get me something on him so I can violate him and put his ass back into prison." Thank God the Lt. is a very fair person whose only requirement his that his registrants abide by the rules of the registration.
New development with my daughter. Her ex found out where her safe room was so we had to move her to another location. It is really sad that he remains free while she remains locked up with her fears. She had to change her cell phone number because she was getting hundreds of blocked phone calls a day. The justice system does not work in favor for the victims. They do not protect the victims or even give them hope. With his past history of assaulting women, he should have never been allowed to post bail. Not only is he harassing my daughter, he tried to run my husband off the road. And every so often, I still see a car parked across the street with their bright lights trained on my house. When my husband is at work, I go to bed at night with a baseball bat, a can of hair spray and a lighter. I figure if he does break in, he has to go through my 115 pound Belgium Shepherd. If he succeeds in getting by those big fangs, then I am going to have a surprise waiting for him. And believe me, I will not hesitate to do what I have to do to keep him from getting his hands on me.
My husband's annual parole termination hearing is this month. We know that the chance of him getting off supervised parole is slim to none, since his PO said it would never happen, but still we try. He's been appointed a new federal public defender. A young guy who was a very aggressive trial lawyer from New York. So while our chances are slim, the hearing should prove to be very interesting.
I think I've caught you up to date with my news. Don't forget to check out my interview. The site is posted in my previous blog. She did include a little about my husband's story on a side bar....so the interview was a success. (Just be warned...the picture of me is terrible. They wanted my serious side..lol)
So, in closing, How have you all been? Thanks to those who have continued to read my blogs and left me comments. I publish all comments, favorable or not. After all, this is supposedly a free country where you are entitled to your own pinion.
Catch My Interview
http://www.mddailyrecord.com/article.cfm?id=9227&type=UTTM
This link will lead you to my interview in the Daily Record, a Baltmore, MD newspaper. Let me know what you think.
Hope all is well with everyone.
Sandy
This link will lead you to my interview in the Daily Record, a Baltmore, MD newspaper. Let me know what you think.
Hope all is well with everyone.
Sandy
Monday, November 24, 2008
My Daughter: Beaten and Choked....A look at Domestic Abuse
I know I haven't been writing lately. Had another form of advocating to do. My daughter's boyfriend of 6 years came home one night and began punching her and put her in a wrestling move which traumatized her shoulder and choked her. Then, he wouldn't let her go to get medical help nor would he even allow her to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. She was sound asleep and was rudely awakened by his beating her. Granted, this is not the first time he has hit her...but this time...Her eyes have been opened. He let her go to work the next morning by holding her dog hostage. He knew he had to let her go to work because he knew that when I couldn't get up with her...I'd be sending the Calvary over there. I took her to the ER and the Sheriff Deputy questioned her and took pictures. Then they went and arrested him. Course, several hours later his mommy bailed him out. Any way...he has a long history of abuse. His last girlfriend pressed charges against him.....he was charged with attempted murder, assault first degree, kidnapping, false imprisonment. They offered him a plea bargain, he plead guilty to 2nd degree assault, spent 18 months in prison and was allowed work release. Not only did he do the same thing to her as with my daughter, but he tortured her for hours by making her stand while he threw "D" batteries at her feet...severely bruising them. He locked her in a room when he went to work and she had to climb out the window. Course, the story he told my daughter was that during an argument, his ex had knifed the inside of his mustang and he slapped her a couple of times. Now my daughter and his first ex are good friends and helping each other. Seems that the whole time he was with my daughter, he was still stalking and harassing his ex. Currently, he is being charged with aggravated assault. (5-10). But they are trying after a tougher charge due to his size compared to hers...he is 5 foot 11...285 pounds. She is 5 foot 4 and 140 pounds!!! So needless to say, I've been writing and calling who ever I can. He's free at the present time, while these women are constantly looking over their shoulders and my daughter can't sleep at night since every sound she hears she gets up to look out the window. And his court date is Jan. 2009.
So my question? These domestic abusers of women never stop. They continue over and over again until they finally kill someone. So why do they not have a registry for those who beat on women? Do they think that sexual abuse is the only crime against women? And look at the nearly nothing sentence he got......no lifetime of probation, no registration...no nothing...free to do it again and again. And guess what would have happened if one of these women were to fight back and accidentally kill him? That's right...life in prison. Yet he got 18 months for attempted murder, kidnapping, and torture (though he wasn't charged with that).
Justice? I don't think so. Justice would be locking him up, throwing away the key...and him getting punked by all those inmates who utterly despise a woman beater. I hope he gets a dish of his own medicine night after night for the next 15-20 years!!!!
That's my baby he beat and could have easily snapped her neck. Her shoulder was messed up, she had several lumps on her head where he punched her, her lip was busted where he back handed her several times when she tried to talk to him, bruises all over her neck from him choking her, pettichaie around her eyes from choking, swollen eye where he hit her on her left temple. Monster is the only word to describe him.
So why are sex offenders, remember the statistics, they rarely re-offend, the object of the Witch Hunts? It's time we change the target to the one group who never stop....the man who physically beats the woman. Normally, sex has nothing to do with it...it's the fear that they get off on.
Yes...I'm rambling. I'm still wired up about what happened. And yes, I'm attempting to make this case as public as I can so there will be no plea bargains this time!!!!
So my question? These domestic abusers of women never stop. They continue over and over again until they finally kill someone. So why do they not have a registry for those who beat on women? Do they think that sexual abuse is the only crime against women? And look at the nearly nothing sentence he got......no lifetime of probation, no registration...no nothing...free to do it again and again. And guess what would have happened if one of these women were to fight back and accidentally kill him? That's right...life in prison. Yet he got 18 months for attempted murder, kidnapping, and torture (though he wasn't charged with that).
Justice? I don't think so. Justice would be locking him up, throwing away the key...and him getting punked by all those inmates who utterly despise a woman beater. I hope he gets a dish of his own medicine night after night for the next 15-20 years!!!!
That's my baby he beat and could have easily snapped her neck. Her shoulder was messed up, she had several lumps on her head where he punched her, her lip was busted where he back handed her several times when she tried to talk to him, bruises all over her neck from him choking her, pettichaie around her eyes from choking, swollen eye where he hit her on her left temple. Monster is the only word to describe him.
So why are sex offenders, remember the statistics, they rarely re-offend, the object of the Witch Hunts? It's time we change the target to the one group who never stop....the man who physically beats the woman. Normally, sex has nothing to do with it...it's the fear that they get off on.
Yes...I'm rambling. I'm still wired up about what happened. And yes, I'm attempting to make this case as public as I can so there will be no plea bargains this time!!!!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Hello!!! It's been soooooooooo long!
Boy do I have a lot to tell you. Sorry I haven't written any earlier!!! Remember, I told you about my back injury? Well...worker's comp are still with holding my loss wages and still refusing to allow my pain management treatment. I'm rescheduled for Nov. 25th so keep your fingers crossed!!! Haven't heard a thing from my lawyer...so I don't know what's going on!!I was interviewed!!!! A reporter saw my blog and wanted to interview me!!!! She wanted the wife's side of what its like to love an RSO and the hassles of our daily lives. She also asked a lot of questions about my husband's story......and she is going to interview him Monday!! She even sent a photographer to get my picture. This is really exciting!! Not only is it good for the cause....MD Citizens 4 Sex Offender Justice...but its good for my husband. Just maybe...if his story gets out.....the public won't be so ignorant about the fact that there truly are innocent men and women on the registry. O.K......that's wishful thinking!!! I receive a lot of trash in with the good....You know the kind..."Sure, sweetie...they all say their innocent....." "Why...of all people...did you pick a sex offender?" Course....all those who sent me the trash were also so ignorant as to label him as a pedophile!!! See..that's why its so important to get these registries changed...everyone is grouped together as child sex offenders!! The same laws apply to everyone!! Course, I know I am really going to get trashed once the interview gets out...But at this point...as Scarlet said in "Gone With the Wind" or was it Rhett Butler? Any way..."I don't give a damn!" If my interview helps just one person see the light..then it was worth it!!! If it makes just one person curious to learn more...than it was worth it!!!Nothing to report on my husband's side. He got a new therapist...did I tell you? Any way...he trusts her as far as he can throw her....and she weighs 400 pounds!! She managed to offend my husband and me on his first session by not letting me in with him. His other therapist thought it was important to get to know me and how he is with me to find out what kind of man he is today. But no...not his new one...she keeps dredging up the past....asking him how he managed in prison for all those years....asking him if he's angry....stupid stuff like that. She doesn't care one iota about the man he is today. The fact that since he's met me...he's more at peace...happier than he's ever been...and more hopeful about the future. And that he finally has something and someone to live for!!! I wonder what her initials after her name mean? Can't mean licensed clinical therapist...because she has no clue about being a therapist. And my husband even asked her how she could be an effective therapist if her client doesn't trust her? She couldn't respond to that....LOL. So I'll sign off for now.....How was your weekend? Hope it was great!!!!!!!!
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